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No Fireworks in My Marriage


My husband, Ryan, and I celebrated 23 years of marriage (7/24/99) and we are NOT experiencing “fireworks” in our relationship.


That isn't a typo. We aren't.


I appreciate that we are way past the temporary feelings of excitement like a new relationship and on to things that sustain a long-lasting love affair. *Marriage counseling was a great gift we gave each other.


I appreciate that we do the tough (and not very sexy) work of standing firm on our faith; believing we can get through all things through Christ that strengthens us.


I appreciate that we learned to be real with each other and it's important to hold each other accountable.


I appreaciate that we learned not to be afraid to argue well, knowing the resolution will take us next level.


I appreacite that we learned the importance of always loving and respecting one another…

…and to provide space and grace when we aren’t very loving and respectful to one another.


We apologize – eventually.


I appreciate that even though we aren't the vibrant, youthful, healthy 18-year-olds who met in CanCun, Mexico, I am more attracted to Ryan as the years pass. After being in love and being loved well by Ryan for 30 years, I’m grateful we have moved past the momentary feelings of “fireworks,” and hung in there moving on to the enduring love that gets us through all the peeks and the valleys we will experience in this lifetime.


And, yes, we still work at keeping the passion alive, but realize it looks and feels different than during the early years of our marriage. So much so we are looking forward to our next 30 years together!


I'd love to connect:

What is stirring inside you as you read this anniversary post?


Did anything surprise you? If so, I would love to hear what surprised you.





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we have been married 32 years and have had many ups, downs and zig zags. We have to work on making time for each other through date nights, walking the dog and occasionally a few days away from the home. We are empty nesters but are in the sandwich generation with elderly parents and kids finding their own way. We are a work in progress but I love my husband more now than ever. Yes, it takes effort to get the sparks going but the day to day love and trust we have is such a blessing.

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